Psychology of Performance – 20 – Early Attachment and Adult Performance Implications

Our early attachments to our primary caregivers may have significant implications for our ability to perform throughout our lives. The good news is that there are mindfulness techniques that can help integrate the information and energy associated with the various attachment categories so that as adults our performance does not have to be limited by the early learning associated with these attachments.

Siegel &  Hartzell, M.Ed., (2003, p.102-112) in their book, Parenting from the Inside Out, describe four patterns of attachment derived from the work of researchers such as Mary Ainsworth, Mary Main, and Erik Hesse, among others. As infants we most likely have one of the following patterns (which can vary by caregiver): Secure, Insecure-Avoidant, Insecure-Anxious/Ambivalent, or Insecure-Disorganized.

Secure attachments are described as having a parental interactive pattern characterized by the parent being emotionally available, perceptive, and responsive. The child sees the parent as being a source of comfort during times of distress, a safe haven, being available, and a secure base. This creates a sense of well being from which the child can go into the world to “explore and make new connections with others” (p.104).

Insecure-Avoidant patterns are associated with parents who are emotionally unavailable, imperceptive, unresponsive, and rejecting. These children avoid closeness and emotional connections to the parent (p.104).

Insecure-Ambivalent patterns are described as having parents who are inconsistently available, perceptive, and responsive and intrusive. The child cannot depend on the parent for attunement and connection. The child develops a sense of anxiety and uncertainty about whether they can depend on their parents (p.105).

Insecure-Disorganization patterns are created by parents who are frightening, frightened, chaotic, disorienting, and alarming to the child. This pattern is often associated with abuse. This creates a situation in which abuse is incompatible with a sense of security. The child develops coping responses that lead to difficulties in regulating emotions, trouble in social communication, difficulties with academic reasoning tasks, a tendency toward interpersonal violence, and a predisposition to dissociation – a process in which normally integrated cognition becomes fragmented (p. 106).

The good news is that for those with insecure attachments there are mindfulness techniques described in Siegel’s book, Mindsight, that can help the individual integrate the insecure attachment memories, patterns, and information in a manner that frees them up from “automatically or habitually” engaging in the pattern in their adult relationships.

The implications of early attachment for the psychology of performance are significant. Secure attachments allow for a base of security which in adulthood can manifest in collaborative interactions in the business environment, for example. The social psychology of group performance is enhanced when members can communicate directly and problem solve from a position of trust. Contrast this with an avoidant attachment pattern in which a team member has a fundamental approach to relationships that is one of distrust and self-reliance. This team member is there in name only and will be perceived as not cooperating, being a maverick, and “not playing well in the sand box.” The anxious attachment style may show up as an accommodating or pleasing style. This person sacrifices their own opinions so as to fit in, may frequently be checking in with the “boss” for approval and reassurance. The group loses this person’s gifts as the person may give in rather than be proactive on a decision point. The disorganized attachment style may contribute to significant disruption in a work group or team’s performance because the person will become overwhelmed during a conflict with either a chaotic or rigid response, either of which can disrupt the flow of energy and information needed for higher performance.

The culture of an organization often is set by the leader of the organization. Part of the definition of culture is the shared set of assumptions as to how we do business. From this, it is possible to see how the impact of the leader’s attachment could influence the culture of the organization. For example, if the leader has an anxious attachment, the organization may have a strong press to accommodate customers, resulting in a high emphasis on customer service which could range from being useful to problematic if taken to a dysfunctional level.

Have a day filled with mindful integration,

Robert A. Mines, Ph.D.
CEO & Psychologist

Psychology of Performance – 18

Gina Kolata wrote an outstanding article in the New York Times on the psychological and behavioral aspects of the psychology of performance that I want to pass on to you. She has a number of points that are useful in business as well as personally.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/19/health/nutrition/19best.html?_r=2&th=&emc

Have a day filled with equanimity

Robert A. Mines, Ph.D.

CEO and Psychologist

Psychology of Performance – 17 Mirror Neurons

In his book The Mindful Therapist, Dr. Dan Siegel discusses the role of mirror neurons in actions that have a perceived intention behind them. He stated that the mirror neurons function as a bridge between sensory input and motor output that allows us to mirror the behavior we see someone else enact (p.36).  Practically this means that when we see someone drinking from a glass, the mirror neurons become activated (firing off electrical currents called an action potential). If we were to drink from the same glass, the same specific neurons that fired when we saw someone else drinking also become activated. Dr. Siegel said “We see a behavior and get ready to imitate it,” (p.36).

The implications of this line of research are significant for performance. For example, if you watch a movie with alcohol being consumed and you are in recovery, now you have internal neuronal firing similar to drinking the alcohol yourself. Now you have to override the neuronal firing with “white-knuckling it,” or better yet with mindful awareness, or you will increase your probabilities of a relapse.

The upside of this research is that seeing others perform a behavior successfully – mentally rehearsing the image – would theoretically strengthen the neuronal firing and increase the probabilities that you will execute the behavior successfully. This concept is foundational to performance coaching. As coaches, therapists, and bosses we need to think about our current training techniques and how they incorporate watching, rehearsing, and doing as part of the sequence.

Have a day filled with Mindfulness,

Robert A. Mines, Ph.D.

CEO & Psychologist

MINES and Associates

How to Save 25-50% from Previous Years Claims

I am almost as excited as our clients to announce that after the pass of the first quarter we’ve been able to demonstrate to our new self-funded clients a savings of up to 50% from the previous year’s quarter on behavioral health and substance abuse claims.

Providing our clients with cost-containment mechanisms to counter the effects of the Mental Health Parity and Addiction Equity Act has been, in their words, “a major relief.”

For some groups this isn’t a big deal.  But if it is for you – ASK ME HOW?

Posted By Ian H.

(303) 953-4083
Sales, MINES and Associates

Psychology of Performance – 10 Sean White

Sean White won the gold medal at the X games. How he did it was an amazing testimony to perseverance and facing the failure of his practice run. My description can not do service to how much pain he must have been in physically and how vulnerable he may have been psychologically (all of us would have been when you see the video). Please go to:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ygOIy7b9mR8

Sean White went back and did the same sequence again so he would not get a fear response. He succeeded the second time and went on to nail the sequence in his first run. That run was good enough for the gold medal.

This is a perfect example of the old cowboy psychology of getting back on your horse after falling off. We need to face our negative cognitions related to performance, learn how to relax and be centered and execute one more time.

Remember: I like you

Bob

Robert A. Mines, Ph.D

CEO & Psychologist

Psychology of Performance – 9

 

How are you doing with your goals and intentions for the new year? At this point, the enthusiasm for the new year may be starting to slip due to unexpected events interfering, not enough “buffer” built into the execution plan, perfectionistic beliefs or all or none thinking sabotaging your decisions to execute, old thought patterns and self-limiting beliefs becoming the default again. These are normal experiences resulting in more of the same unless they are persistently challenged. 

It is time to evaluate the initial start and make refinements in your goals, plan and thinking. Worst case; remember 10 percent of something is better than 90% of nothing when it comes to making change and performing better. 

Have a day filled with loving kindness, compassion, sympathetic joy, equanimity and impeccable sobriety, 

Robert A. Mines, Ph.D. 

CEO and Psychologist

Psychology of Performance – 7

I have the opportunity to observe and participate with businesses and organizations going through growth and contraction. In either scenario, execution is essential. What makes it so interesting from a psychological perspective is the role beliefs and assumptions play in the analysis, planning and execution. The beliefs and assumptions are often associated with a variety of emotional states that the leaders, managers, supervisors and employee experience under either scenario. Yesterday, I had a conversation with a friend who said he wished he did not worry as much as he did during his very successful career. I had a colleague who is a risk manager and is worries about executing on a very aggressive growth plan. I have other colleagues who have laid off significant numbers of their staff due to the impact on the recession and experience depression and anxiety. In each case, the negative emotional states can can contribute to inefficiencies or delays in the execution of the plan. As one cognitive perspective says “Suffering comes from attachment”. One needs to present and nonattached while performing and executing on a plan. Look deeply into this and see if you are limiting your execution in some way.

Have a day filled with equanimity,

Robert A. Mines, Ph.D.

CEO & Psychologist

Mines and Associates

Psychology of Performance – 5

In past posts I have discussed various concepts such as where your mind goes the energy goes, beliefs and assumptions, relaxation techniques, managing stress for optimal performance and other techniques. Today, I want to discuss the role of curiousity and non-attachment in performance. When you awaken, do you start your day with a sense of curiosity or dread? Today’s Bronco/Bengal football game was a perfect example of being curious, nonattached to the outcome and realizing that life presents us opportunities to perform that we could never plan for. The Broncos were behind 6-7 with 38 seconds left. They were on the 14 yard line, had one incomplete pass and attempted a second. The pass was tipped away from the primary receiver and a second receiver from the Broncos was in the area. He caught the ball and ran 86 yards for the go ahead touchdown. The Broncos won the game.  Each day we get to train/prepare for opportunities that may occur tomorrow. Being curious and nonattached to outcome allows us to perform to our best and the outcome may not be in our hands as the Broncos and Bengals found out today. This is the case in business and our personal lives as well as sports.

Have a day filled with equanimity,

Bob

Robert A. Mines, Ph.D.

CEO & Licensed Psychologist

Psychology of Performance – 4

I just completed a very interesting book, “Born to Run” that my son and colleague, Matt Mines recommended. It is about long distance running, the Tarahumara runners, elite ultra marathoners such as Scott Jurek and most importantly, joy. There are many wonderful stories in the book. The most capativating were the stories of the runners who were in the moment, filled with joy and performing. The application to our world of work is clear as well. How often are we in the moment, filled with joy and happiness as we do our work? If not, what do we need to do to engage at that level? Where your mind goes, the energy goes!

Have a day filled with loving kindness, sympathetic joy, compassion, equinimity and impeccable sobriety,

Robert A. Mines, Ph.D.

CEO & Psychologist

Coyotes and Deadlines Don’t Mix

Last night, just as the sun was setting, I was walking my roomate’s dog down a very popular trail in in the Denver Tech Center. Ten feet to my left  on the trail was a Heidi’s Deli and ten yards to my right was my neighborhood. It doesn’t get more suburban than this area. I have always been a person very aware of my surroundings, especially at night,  I even carry mace on my key-chain “just in case.”  One of the biggest reasons I moved to DTC was the safe ambiance I felt walking outside. I never imagined this would happen.

As I was coming down the trail I let Copper, a beagle, off of his leash.  As usual he frolicked in the grass and sniffed everything in sight. Unbeknownst to me, there were three coyotes hunting us in the the bushes only a few feet away. They started to slowly surround us just as you would imagine three thugs in an alley that wanted to take your purse, only my fear was they wanted Copper’s life and possibly mine. If you think this sounds like the movies, that’s exactly how it felt. Surreal.

In a moment’s notice, my body went from a state of peace to being filled with adrenaline. You have so many thoughts running through your mind; when you were seven and your girl scout leader told you on that camping trip what to do if you run into a bear, how you’re going to tell your best friend her dog’s dead, would the coyotes go into attack mode if I started running and more importantly would Copper follow me. My heart felt as it was close to beating right out of my body. The adrenaline doesn’t leave room for you to cry, but more so,  you run through all of your thoughts as fast as you can imagine and apply them in a way that you can have the best outcome. Copper dying wasn’t an option. I yelled at the top of my lungs, stood on my tippy toes and acted as big as I could and violently shook my keys. I don’t know that I scared them but I definitely confused them and after several minutes I scared Copper enough with my crazy woman antics to cower over to me. It wasn’t yet over.

As soon as I got Copper back on his leash I ran up a grassy hillside into the Heidi’s parking lot and all three of them chased me. Then I booked it…I ran so fast his collar came off his head. Trembling, I put the collar back on and raced across the street, stopping traffic with my hands. It seemed we were safe but nothing was certain until I hit my front door. Running as fast as I could we finally made it. As soon as my door was closed I started to sob. Physiologically my body has never gone through an adrenaline rush that intense. Everyone has moments of an adrenaline rush but this was the longest I had ever been in the “Fight or Flight” response. I was drained emotionally and physically.

This morning when I woke up to go to work I felt like I had been hit by a bus. I’m not a doctor but I know that physiologically that adrenaline release had seriously affected my body and mind. My nerves felt completely shot. Which is where the deadline comes in. I was on deadline today for an important sales proposal.

Most people know the rush of adrenaline you get when you have a deadline to meet and the state of mind you need to focus. I still felt so stressed and depleted from the night before. I felt like I wasn’t doing anything right and I was being short with my colleagues. All of this made me feel guilty and I was sure no one wanted to hear about my coyote story or think it was a valid excuse for being less than myself.

Luckily, I work in an organization with amazingly supportive people who undoubtedly care about your mental health.  I was able to share my story at work and it immediately helped my coworkers understand. Many people truly underestimate how important managing your stress is and how greatly it can impact your work productivity. My situation was intense but it certainly wasn’t a long-term issue. It did, however, severly affect my mind and productivity the next day. Many people don’t share the stressors they are having in their life. They may be uncomfortable  sharing their story or it may be a situation that needs serious and proffesional attention. Either way, this is just another great example of how important an Employee Assistance Program can be to an organization’s productivity.

If you are finding yourself in a stressful situation please visit the following links from MINES and Associates for Stress Management Techniques:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-I2HDFA2W4s

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFMo-6wDWlM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbUbLQQfeB8

Not all of us have a saber tooth tiger (or coyotes) chasing us at work. However, stress can be debilitating. Please find healthy ways to relieve it. I sure felt better.

Britney Kirsch, Account Management

Mines and Associates